"Hungarian dubbing of foreign films is the best in the world."
"Er...how do you know?"
"I remember one poem I read in translation. It was so beautiful. It touched me so much. It must have been even better than the original."
"This rain must make you feel at home. Real English weather."
"Exactly where are we again?"
"English people are terrible at languages."
"And just what language are we speaking in right now?"
"Ah, well...not you, obviously but..."
"Hold on a minute. What is your motivation for learning English?"
"It's spoken all over the world...language of business, internet, lingua franca, blah blah."
"So you only have to learn one foreign language, right?"
"So exactly which foreign language should an English person choose, then? One which would offer exactly the same level of motivation and yield the same results. I would have to learn at least four foreign languages to give me the same benefit as your one."
"You must be happy about Labour introducing an ethical foreign policy."
"You've heard about that?"
"Oh, yes. The Hungarian press is the bes..."
"Problem is, dear heart, that ethical is defined as anything the United States decides is in its interests. The identical actions by any other country not backed by them is defined as international terrorism."
"Historically, the same is true. Go back to Nürnburg and look at what was defined as being a war crime. Basically anything they did that we didn't. Bombing the buggery out of civilian populations was carried out on a far greater scale by the allies than by any of the axis powers. And look at Pearl Harbour. Japan's reasons for its pre-emptive strike were exactly the same as those being used now to justify the war in Iraq. All those US bombers and warships stationed in the Pacific region, talked about in US Govt at the time as being able to reduce the wooden houses of Japan to charcoal and destroy their industrial base...a threat far more real and tangible than anything Iraq posed to the US. Again, we are moral. You are an international terrorist."
"But at least there was and is an international consensus, a coalition..."
"And just who were the first on board this time, eh? Britain, obviously. Hanging on to the coat tails of the US administration. Russia was there, too. Had to be. Chechnya. Quid pro quo. Turkey. Pakistan. Quid pro bloody quo."
"So you would be a Democrat, then?"
"You just don't get it, do you? Clinton and Kosovo ring any bells? Carter and El Salvador?"
"English food isn't as good as the Hungarian, is it?"
"Ever tried it?"
"And just who is the most popular TV chef in Hungary right now?"
I rest my case(s).